I remember a family friend once noticing (with a laugh) that the story of Jesus’ family not missing him for three days shows that Jesus, too, came from a dysfunctional family. That story occurs when Mary and Joseph and an extended group of their kin travel from Nazareth to Jerusalem for the Passover and on the trip back discover that their 12-year-old son is not with them. 

I can’t even imagine the panic! 

But aside from the anxiety of the lost child, I wonder about the size of that caravan of people, the siblings, cousins, aunts, and uncles that helped look out for one another, that celebrated holidays together. But also a sizable group that might make it easy not to notice the absence of one. 

When they find the tween Jesus – idealized but also realistic – he’s a little bit cheeky (“Why didn’t you know where I’d be? Duh!”) and also naturally expressing a little independence. He’s starting it understand who he is and telling his parents who he is. 

Part of what Jesus reveals – and that Luke’s Gospel starts to reveal to us in this story – is what family is. The Gospel of Luke starts with Jesus’ close family – with Elizabeth and Zechariah and John who will become the Baptist. It starts with Mary and Joseph – Jesus’ immediate family – traveling to Bethlehem because of who their ancient family is, because of their lineage back to David. 

And when Mary and Jospeh find Jesus in the Temple, where they all traveled together with extended family, he expresses an understanding of being part of an even larger family. He is in his Father’s house. The Temple gives him an understanding of being part of a family that includes these teachers studying Torah.  

Later, as an adult, Jesus will further broaden the notion of family. From his biological family to the family of faith, he will expand his understanding of family to those who were considered outsiders. Family now includes all the world, especially sinners, the “impure,” people who worship differently, women, children, all sorts of leftist people. 

If we look around the world today – including and maybe especially in our faith communities – maybe we are all part of a big dysfunctional family. Perhaps the idea that we connected by bonds of family to everyone else might challenge us to think about family in new ways. 

For those of us who are part of worshipping congregations, it can feel familial. Being a member of a congregation is often the first way we experience being close to people outside our households. These are people we might not choose as friends but sit next to and pray with. People who we might love dearly – and also have to forgive for being imperfect. 

Not everyone comes from a family that is loving, and sometimes that makes the image of a congregation as family problematic. I’ll admit, with a title like “Mother” I have concerns that people will think of me in a parental role in a congregation and that’s probably not healthy. And yet the image of us being family can be helpful. These are people to whom we have connections, responsibilities, and obligations. 

Another challenge is how to extend the concept of family beyond the congregation. What counts as family grows from immediate (parents and children) to extended to companions in faith to…

All humanity. 

There are hints of this sense of belonging together right from the beginning of creation. Our tradition is clear that all humans are made in the image of God and share in God’s love. 

From that beginning humans break off into tribes and nations. And yet there are messages throughout human history that we are to welcome strangers and show hospitality to all. 

Families are not perfect and not meant to be perfect. What they are meant to be is together. 

I hope that when you are in the company of your various kinds of family families you might find yourself in the company of kin. People who help you feel connected to larger and larger circles of responsibility, obligation, and love. 

I hope being in these families helps you see yourself within a big, extended family of God.